Resting

I’m always waiting for the next best thing. Waiting to go to nursing school. Then I couldn’t wait to be done with nursing school.

Once I was officially DONE with nursing school, then I had to wait to take the NCLEX.

Now the NCLEX is done (and I PASSED! Praise the Lord!).

What’s the next best thing? Finding a job. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be. So far I’ve applied for 20+ positions (okay, so it’s not a lot compared to some people), and I haven’t had any calls about any of them.

And at least 9 of my classmates have jobs already (not that I’m keeping track?).

I really am excited for them. And I’m trying to keep the green-eyed monster at bay.

My roommate (and nursing classmate) had an interview yesterday and has another one for a different position next week.

I want to be excited for her and help her through it (and I am), but I want to be able to do so without feeling frustrated with myself for not applying for more positions, for not having a good enough resume to get call backs. I don’t want to become bitter.

I’m aware of where my heart is in all of this – and I don’t want to follow it down that road of bitterness and jealousy.

I am excited for my roommate and all of my classmates. And I keep reminding myself that God has a spot out there for me. Whether it’s one that I’ve applied for yet or not. He will continue to guide me and bring me to the place that He wants me to be. He brought me back to Northwestern for nursing school rather than the U of M. He provided throughout nursing school and he continues to provide for me in this in-between time.

I know that in the days to come, once I find a job, I will miss the days of doing “nothing” and being able to sleep in and [finally!] relax after a crazy busy 16 months of nursing school. I am thankful for these days to recover from the non-stop craziness of school. And resting in God’s promises that He knows what’s best for me right now.